hey all, i will be closing this blog but i wont delete this blog, jus that i would no longer be posting in here anymore. maybe someday, somehow i can return here and read the entries; to remember, smile and maybe even at times. i will start a new one soon. do ask me for it if you are interested. till then, i shall bid farewell to this blog. it has accompanied and listened to me for 2years and is one of our first together. it just holds too much for me that i wouldnt be able to move on if i remained here...i finally cried, 3 years later......
and yet i DONT hate you
maybe i can finally cry.i thought i could but all i had were few drops of tearsit's over....
maybe i'm just being analbut i just dont like hillsongsdont like it when people get all so excited over hillsongswanting so much to attend their sessions and blah blahthink it's just mewe each have our own preferences so i accept Yours
i really wanted to crybut i just cant
no matter how i try
dont ask me why
cause i too have no idea
has the tears dried up?
Lord, i come before you broken. i lay down before you, at Your feet and i acknowledge your awesomeness and power. We fall down We lay our crowns At the feet of Jesus The greatness of mercy and love At the feet of Jesus We cry holy, holy, holy We cry holy, holy, holy We cry holy, holy, holy My Jesus, I love you I know thou are mine To thee all the follies of sin I resent My gracious redeemer My savior, art thou If ever I'll love you My Jesus tis nowForgive me for it is my desire to honour You This is my desire to honor You
Lord with all my heart
I worship You
All I have within me
I give you praise
All that I adore is in You
Lord I give You my heart
I give You my soul
I live for You alone
Every breath that I take
Every moment I'm awake
Lord have Your way in me
I live for You alone
I live for You
Lord have Your way in me
Lord have Your way
As i stumble through this emotional barrage, i have come to realise something that i should always have done and that is to trust God. I've lost my way, trying to solve it by my own strength, hanging on to the toy that should have been let go for Him to mend. Lord, i trust you. help me to see Your plans for me. whatever route you choose for me, i pray that you grant me the strength to hold fast to them. forgive me for this late realisation and in the end, You are the centre of it all. Not me, not her, not anyone.
In His time, in His time,
He makes all things beautiful in His time
Lord, my life to You I bring
May each song i have to singBe to You a lovely thing, in Your time
in Your time i trust and hold on...
i see myself in it. do you?
writinghand movementsthoughtscardsunderstandingthinkingemotionsthat's how and what i amtake it or leave it....
jem and dan are back
the timing cant be any better
spending time with you 2 are one filled with joy and much delight
really missed the company of you 2
really missed the support of my 2 christian brothers
it was no surprise that the lowest period of my life coincide with their absence
i never thought that i would say it but i really miss you 2
im straight; just another emotional wreck
yeah!
3 down, 7 to gowhy does it take so long?
i miss Youi really do, still miss You....You and iYou, iYoui
The truth is tearing up my heart I can't recognise this place The endless road without a stop sign Can't even find a stranger this time chorus Why am I still holding back my tears In this loneliness there's nothing left to fear Every chord still seems a wonder How we could be together Everytime I ask if this would be the last Why am I still talking to myself Hoping you will have the keys to my cell Every song might calm the weather But it just draws me deeper How do I get out of this I think~ I never will A crystal forming in the eye Maybe this would be the last The winding path down my face Till I begin to taste the bitterness inside I never will Li Jun Jie - Endless Road
you are beautiful
it's only monday.. mondayi still have got tuesday, wednesday, thursday and friday before the weekend.then it would be monday, tuesday, wednesday, thursday and friday before we get to the weekend.the whole mundance cycle starts all over again....when will it end?why is it without You here with me?why, why tell me why..did i deserve all these and of all days it has to be monday...
yeah! it's friday once again!goodbye friday, welcome weekends!
2 down and 8 to go!
oh man, i have not looked forward so much to the weekends ever since my army days and the WORLD CUP STARTS TODAY! for those that are thinking of betting, FORGET IT! please, please.. i have already "spent" $250 helping a friend pay back his debts and i didnt get a single cent back! So please dont for if you really run into debts, dont expect me to lend you money and dont blame me for being heartless coz i warned you so. I have seen families (including one of my relatives) whose family was broken because of that. So please, please, DONT BET! I cant emphasis enough that you dont even start, even for a small sum because that's usually where most gamblers begin.netherlands, argentina & england. anyone?
for those who know me well enough, im a melancholic hence my nicks etc...have always like the song, "nobody knows" by tony rich project but it was till i was in office yesterday that i actually listened to the lyrics. was then inspired to write the following song. havent thought of a tune for it, anyone wanna help me with that? Here it is:Nobody
I pretend that Im glad you chose to leave
Leave for once without causing any pain
Felt like a clown putting on a show
Stupidity is real even if nobody knows
Nobody but me
** How good can I get
You could ask my heart
Like a veneer thats been torn apart
If I was really that important, why choose to let go
If I was that valuable, why choose to give up
Why choose when you have yet to even see
Why choose when u wanted to know
How much I meant to you***
I pretend that Im glad you went away
Leave for once, with pain causing more each day
Felt like a clown putting on a show
Pain is real even if nobody knows
Nobody but me **
I pretend that you were around
I screamed, hoping you could (would) hear me
Felt like a clown putting on a show
I carry a tear even if nobody knows
Nobody but me **
With tears as I smiled
Never thought I would say it to another
But I guess I miss you, I really did even if nobody knows
Nobody… but me **
*** Felt like a clown putting on a show
I carry your smile as you watched
- Inspired by Tony Rich Project
Nobody Knows -
joshua saysjoshua says he's tiredjoshua says he doesnt want to think about it anymorejoshua says he's just confused just as you arejoshua says he's leaving it to GODjoshua says goodbyejoshua sayswhat did i say again?
life's a jigsaw that's been torn apart
falling
im falling, where i do not know
not knowing where the end is
but it is the end where i wanna see You
You are all I ask
and i ask because im falling- falling for Youspiraling down the rabbit hole
from then...
through time...
till now...
thank you for the memories ....
some randomness:
sometimes i wonder who i really am. so many things that i thought i was, i wasnt. I thought i was mature but time and time again, it was proven not to be so.
I know i'm a guy. My face tells me so. My hair skin tells me so. My mind tells me so. My friends tell me so. Most importantly, my birth says so too. I look at myself and wondered, how did i turn out this way? I wasnt really trilled to discover in the previous post that i'm 73% female and only 27% male. i know i shouldnt read too much but dont think it's just restating the obvious? I feel a man but i also feel a lady. i think like a man but i also think like a lady. Just that i feel and think more "lady". does this make me any less "man"? now i know why homosexuals claim it really isnt their choice. It isnt my choice either to be more "lady"
I remember reading from glori's blog something about being emotional; to think from the heart and not from the head, one that society frowns upon. i cant help it however hard i try. is this how i'm supposed to be? is this........ mature?
to be void of such emotions is to deny the very nature of humanity
everyone's making a wish list (Great Singapore Sale, anyone) so it's time for me to have mine too.
(fyi, its in-exhaustive)
+ bag to go with my formal attire
+ pair of shoes
+ capo
+ k800/d600
+ facial treatment
+ 2 pairs of g2000 shirts
+ a pair of pants
+ mp3 player
+ haircut
+ oakley sunnies
+ YOU
just cant have YOU however hard i try
| Your Brain is 73% Female, 27% Male |
Your brain leans female
You think with your heart, not your head
Sweet and considerate, you are a giver
But you're tough enough not to let anyone take advantage of you! |
this confirms the obvious....
<$BlogItemDateTime$>
